Have you ever noticed that even though you may objectively “have it all”, there can still be an undercurrent of frustration or irritability that weaves its way into your day.
I see this in my own life, and see it in some of the lives around me. A certain restlessness that is masked by striving for more–Maybe a different car, or home, or in some cases, new people with whom to share our lives. Lately, I’ve been redecorating every room in our house–which is basically taking the form of rearranging and moving furniture from one room to the next. At times, the striving takes the form of constant and never-ending self-improvement: if only I was X pounds lighter, or if I really nailed dancer’s pose, or if I could meditate without my mind wandering, etc., then I’d really be happy.
I’m not talking about not going for what you want. Instead, I’m talking about the seductive distraction of striving that prevents us from fully and thoroughly relaxing into this moment. Even if we attain the (fill in the blank), we wind up exactly where we began. Cause, let’s face it. At some point, setting more goals for the bigger and better, the newer and brighter, well, it just doesn’t cut it.
So, how do we dismantle the escape hatch, and resolve the restlessness?
Maybe it has to do with recommitting to our current lives, resolving to be fully open and embrace the frizzy, messy, rough around the edges stuff. This is daunting, for sure, but perhaps it is where the real richness of our lives resides.
I once knew a man who immediately looked for all the Exit signs in any new building he entered. Back then, I laughed at this, thinking that that was pretty excessive. Yet, its curious to notice just how often in our daily lives we symbolically plan escape routes, looking for ways out. How different might things be if instead, we could figure out ways to swim more deeply in the waters of the ocean we’re already in, to really commit to this life? What we may really be after isn’t an escape route after all, but rather a way deeper into what we already have.